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Excerpt: Well Nourished

A prolonged dependency on your mother is an indication that something is wrong with you. I remember a woman in my hometown (Palatka, Florida) that thought it was entirely appropriate to nurse her children until they were school age. To make matters worse, she was happy to nourish her children in very public locations around town. You could spot her breast-feeding a child half her size at the city park or at the grocery store. Her kids were old enough to hold a conversation, read simple phrases, eat a few slices of pizza in one sitting, and go to the bathroom on their own, yet they were still being breast-fed. They whole thing became a big joke, townsfolk would swap stories about the latest place they spotted her feeding her children while the other children poked fun at the well-nourished kids she had raised. Like breast feeding, sponsoring a new church is supposed to be a relatively brief experience, just as children are expected to grow up and function on their own, so are churches. Extended periods of dependency hurt both the mother and child. The continued drain on resources makes it impossible for the mother church to have more children and the new church’s extended adolescence prohibits them from becoming a mature, reproducing congregations.

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